Tiger Mother, burning bright.

Have you been following the “Tiger Mother” story all over the media over the past 10 days or so?

In a nutshell, a Yale law professor, Amy Chua, wrote a book (Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mother) describing how she’s brought up her two daughters in the strict Chinese fashion that her own parents used. The original story in the Wall Street Journal – Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior – described a childhood with no playdates, not TV, no computer games and hours of music practice. Her daughters are not allowed to: attend a sleepover, be in a school play, choose their own extracurricular activities, get any grade less than an A, or not be the No. 1 student in every subject (except gym and drama). Mrs. Chua told about her priority to raise “successful” kids, often with “tough love” tactics. For example, the time her 4-year-old daughter brought her a homemade Birthday card and Mrs. Chua returned it, saying “I want a better one – one that you’ve put some thought and effort into … I deserve better than this. So I reject this.” Yikes!

Needless to say, mothers around the country reacted…and they were not supportive.

Mrs. Chua started going on the defensive, and tried to explain in a follow-up WSJ interview that she was telling about how she parented in the past, and now she has learned some lessons and is not so harsh. Her protestations were a little weak, if you ask me, and she really doesn’t apologize or regret those rules and tactics she used when her girls were younger.

I’ve read a few interesting responses to Mrs. Chua’s “tiger mother.” I recommend Jeff Yang of the San Francisco Chronicle’s SFGate, who wrote a column featuring stories of his own “crazy Asian mom” and his own interview with Mrs. Chua.

This past Sunday’s New York Times Magazine had a feature under The Way We Live Now header, titled “No More Mrs. Nice Mom,” in which author Judith Warner discussed the Tiger Mother and hit on some points that really resonated with me and the way I often describe the Ridgewood parents I encounter at HSA meetings and soccer sidelines. Ms. Warner writes,

The terror of losing ground is the ultimate driving force in the middle- and upper-middle-class American family today, and however unique Chua’s elaboration of it…however obnoxious and over the top her attempts to cope, she is hardly alone in believing that, in her carefully considered ministrations, she will find the perfect alchemy that will allow her to inoculate her kids against personal and professional misfortune.

Through all the iterations of Mommy madness, “good” and “bad,” this article of faith always remains intact: that parents can have control. Developmental neuroscientists may talk of genes and as-yet-undiscovered-and-hence-uncontrollable environmental factors that affect the developing fetus, social scientists may talk of socioeconomic background and the predictive power of parents’ level of education — the rest of us keep hope alive that parental actions, each and every moment of each and every better-lived day, have the ultimate ability to shape a child’s life outcome.

That, my friends, is the source of so much frustration here in Ridgewood (and undoubtedly elsewhere in other so-called affluent communities). We are in a strange time, as we parents start to acknowledge how our children are under so much pressure to succeed, that the college acceptance merry-go-round and the AP course race might be out of control, that the childhood resume-building could be unhealthy (you think?). Parents at our high school and middle school HSAs have been captivated by the movie Race to Nowhere, and have begun questioning the amount of homework kids receive or how many AP classes they really need to take.

At the same time, sometimes even in the same room (at the high school HSA meeting, for example), parents are strategizing and looking for the magic combination of courses and GPA and AP scores that will make their child most attractive to colleges. I’m still trying to understand the parents who commented in the District’s recent parent survey that they wished their 1st grade child had more homework, or wished that there were more history and science tests in 2nd grade. I have often commented and attributed some Ridgewood parents’ drive to this phenomenon described by Ms. Warner – the belief that every little decision parents make for their children, every teacher assignment, every single activity or project or sports team, etc. – will actually determine their child’s future success (and, presumably, earning power). It's crazy, if you ask me, but it's there all the time: If I do everything right, then everything for my child will work out OK. Don't you think that's just a bit conceited of us? And isn't history riddled with stories of perfectly good people who did all the right things and yet life doesn't work out so well for them?

We parents have got to reconcile this dichotomy. We can’t simultaneously decry the stress our kids are under while maneuvering to get the “right” extracurriculars onto their resume. We can’t say “give them less homework and fewer tests” and then turn around and complain that RHS is not ranked high enough in New Jersey Monthly magazine.

One thing this "tiger mother" story is bringing to light for Ridgewood parents is that we are all part of the problem and, thus, we all need to be part of the solution.

"Schools don’t fail in Glen Rock, Ridgewood and Mendham for a reason and it has nothing to do with tenure."

I liked today's column from Alfred Doblin in the Bergen Record -- it's a good response to Governor Christie's Town Hall meeting last week in Paramus.

Reprinting Doblin's column here (AKA, no time to write tonight!):

Doblin: Put teachers on the table, not in the trash
GOVERNOR CHRISTIE came to Paramus last week and, like anyone coming to Paramus, he came to shop. But the governor was not shopping for something; he came to shop his ideas for education reform.

At a Thursday town hall meeting he said, “When you have schools like the 200 chronically failing schools in New Jersey with 104,000 students in them that have been judged to be chronically failing, we’re going to close them and start over.”

Starting over means not just closing these schools, but doing away with teacher tenure and replacing it with merit pay attached to student performance. It also means opening more charter schools. Blocking the way is the New Jersey Education Association, according to Christie. The NJEA is the Big Bad Wolf.

Maybe there is some truth to that, but there isn’t just one wolf bearing its teeth on the path to grandma’s high-property-taxed house. Let’s face it: Chris Christie isn’t Little Red Riding Hood.

Two hundred failing schools is unacceptable. But the state Department of Education’s website lists a total of 2,485 schools in New Jersey. That means less than 10 percent are failing. It would seem that the majority of schools, and the teachers inside them, are doing rather well. No doubt, students in failing schools can take little solace in that.

I agree 100 percent with the governor about tenure. I do not believe in guaranteed jobs for life. I do not accept the notion that the current form of tenure allows for the removal of poor-performing teachers. But eliminating tenure without having a viable alternative that does not leave teachers vulnerable to the whims of angry parents and school board members with agendas is equally unacceptable.

What I see as problematic in all the school-reform talk is that none of it acknowledges that while the state has a constitutional obligation to provide a thorough and efficient education, students do not have a constitutional obligation to be willing participants. They can be forced to show up, but they cannot be forced to learn.

Teachers can motivate many students. Great teachers can work some miracles. But there are many factors from home life to language skills to neighborhood safety that affect how a child learns. Public schools are required to take in everybody.

Charter schools have not been shown to be universally better than public schools. Parents who push for their children to be in a charter school are equally likely to push for their children in a public school. One pushing parent is worth more than a room full of pushing Christies.

And I am sick and tired of hearing about the Robert Treat Academy in Newark. The charter school is by all accounts a very fine institution. But it also is the creation of one of the most powerful political figures in New Jersey, Stephen Adubato. Politicians visit it like devout Catholics visit Lourdes. Enough already.

The governor can close every poor performing school in New Jersey tomorrow and replace them with a charter school and there will still be failing schools because if those schools are required to teach everybody, they will have some students who will not get with the program. And if these charter schools toss out the students who do not meet their schools’ criteria, where do these students land?

There is a reason – a reason more complex than tenure – for failing schools. Schools don’t fail in Glen Rock, Ridgewood and Mendham for a reason and it has nothing to do with tenure. It’s stability. It’s parents. It’s safety. It’s many, many things.

The leadership of the NJEA remains a good target because it has been inflexible. It has put its interests ahead of it members. But less than 10 percent of the schools in New Jersey are chronically failing. If teachers, and yes, the NJEA, are to blame for 200 failing schools, they are also responsible for 2,285 schools that are succeeding.

Christie should take credit for raising issues that no public official has dared touch. Everything about education should be on the table – tenure, salaries, pensions, class sizes, federal and state mandates, charter schools – put them all on the table.

I’m sure the audience in Paramus was appreciative of the governor’s tough talk. The governor is passionate and, from my experience with him, it’s real. It’s not generated for the cameras or the polls. He is who he is.

He is a product of public schools. And he needs to remember that. Teachers and their contracts should be on the table; they should not be in the trash.

Alfred P. Doblin is the editorial page editor of The Record. Contact him at doblin@northjersey.com. Follow AlfredPDoblin on Twitter.

School board candidates' kits are available now.

The Ridgewood BOE will have two vacancies in the April 27 Annual School Election. A full term on the school board runs for three years. Candidate kits are currently available in the Board Secretary's office at the Education Center, 49 Cottage Place, or online from the New Jersey School Boards Association. The deadline for filing candidate petitions is Tuesday, March 8, at 4 p.m.

Some helpful information from the New Jersey School Boards Association:

How to Become a School Board Member

Important 2011 School Board Candidacy & Election Dates

Requirements of the New Jersey School Ethics Act

Nominating Petition for Annual School Election

School Board Candidate Briefing Dates

Campaign Reporting Requirements

Discussing the Planning Board "invitation."

One of the more challenging parts of the job of being a member of the Board of Education is reading the newspaper stories that purport to tell the facts of this or that BOE event, and to see the difference between what is reported and what actually happened. Our small-town press, with a rotating cast of reporters, is imperfect (as is the national press, of course, though not usually to the same extent). Most of the time the facts are correct, but often the choice of quotes can skew the picture.

Anyway, my latest frustration was in reading the quotes attributed to me in the North Jersey.com story about the Board of Ed declining to participate in another Planning Board hearing. A quote from me about "moving forward" made it sound like I wanted to "move on." That isn't what I said or meant! So, I’d like to reprint here my comments from Monday night and, through the magic of the Internet, improve those comments further in order to make myself as clear as possible.

Monday night, I started by looking at the lengthy invitation (resolution) from the Planning Board. There were page after page of whereas this and whereas that. And then on page 5 they finally got to the point:

WHEREAS, although not an "official" action pursuant to law, the Planning Board wishes to memorialize its vote to confirm its intent to create an amicable forum and opportunity for open dialogue among the persons in interest, recognizing that an opportunity to be heard and to have issues vetted is appropriate for the community.

NOW, THEREFORE, BE IT RESOLVED, that the Planning Board of the Village of Ridgewood does hereby memorialize its vote "to invite and encourage" the BOE to attend an additional courtesy review meeting, together with the neighbors of the subject Properties for purpose of discussing the issues of field lighting for RHS and Stevens fields…

Monday night, I said that if the point of the proposed hearing (or “courtesy review”) was to give persons an opportunity to be heard and have open dialogue, then we don’t need the Planning Board to do that. Yes, I facetiously did say that we have plenty of space at the Ed Center to hold meetings and have dialogue. But I also said to my colleagues on the Board and to Dr. Fishbein that if our position is that we are already working with the neighbors to resolve our differences, then we need to keep working with the neighbors. We need to keep moving forward and show progress.

We tried to meet with the neighbors to get input on the Fields Policy, and they didn’t want to participate – choosing to wait for a decision regarding the Planning Board. Now that we’ve made our decision, we need to answer the neighbors on our own.

My concern is that we “on the inside” – on the Board and in the Ed Center – feel like we’re making progress (and we are), but it doesn’t look that way from the outside. We already know the answers to many of the neighbors’ questions. We’ve taken steps on things like signage at the fields and porta-johns and revisions to the Fields Policy and communicating standards of conduct to athletes. We on the Board know these things are happening – and that’s part of the reason we don’t feel the need to go to a Planning Board hearing. But we have not done a good job of communicating this information.

We have been talking about a “master list of concerns,” with answers and solutions, which will be shared with the neighbors and the entire community. We’ve been talking about the list for over a month, but we haven’t accomplished it yet. (Note: Monday night Dr. Fishbein updated the Board…the list will be done soon.)

I know we have the answers. I know we are or will be taking steps to address everything. I have no doubt and I am quite secure in the “rightness” of the things we’re doing. But I can see that from the outside, the answers and the info aren’t visible.

I don’t want to just keep inviting the neighbors to meetings where we “listen.” There’s really no reason for us to keep hearing the same concerns and the same questions. We have some answers, we'll get some more, let's start sharing them.

As I said Monday night, I am opposed to participating in a Planning Board hearing, but I say that with the understanding that, in my opinion, we need to that we are putting the neighbors’ concerns to bed.

(Note: The Board will send an official response to the Planning Board and I'll post it here when it's available.)

Big changes coming to AP courses, tests.

Very interesting story in the New York Times about AP courses and a major re-vamping set to take place for the 2012-13 school year. An excerpt from the story:

Next month, the [College] Board, the nonprofit organization that owns the A.P. exams as well as the SAT, will release a wholesale revamping of A.P. biology as well as United States history — with 387,000 test-takers the most popular A.P. subject. A preview of the changes shows that the board will slash the amount of material students need to know for the tests and provide, for the first time, a curriculum framework for what courses should look like. The goal is to clear students’ minds to focus on bigger concepts and stimulate more analytic thinking. In biology, a host of more creative, hands-on experiments are intended to help students think more like scientists.

I find it interesting that the College Board could be leading the way toward putting the brakes on the mile wide/inch deep curriculum trend. I wonder how these changes in the AP courses and tests will translate (if at all) to the NJ state biology test (and other planned end-of-course tests) that are currently being revised because students performed so poorly. It will also be interesting to see how teachers will need to adapt their styles, etc., to the new curriculum.

In Ridgewood, our teachers completed an update of AP curriculum a few years ago. It looks like there will be new work to be done to revise our Biology and History curriculum again, to align with the AP courses and tests.

Click here for the full article in the NY Times.

On the agenda for January 10 BOE meeting.

Tomorrow night the Ridgewood Board of Education will meet for a regular public meeting at 7:30 p.m. at the Ed Center, 3rd floor. (Come on down and watch in person, or watch live on TV Channel 77 or online click here.)

Some highlights from the agenda:

We’ll see a presentation of the middle school program of studies for 2011-12. It’s basically the exact same program of studies as currently, but with a change to the 8th grade algebra course for special ed students.

Dr. Fishbein will update us on various referendum projects, mostly work on the additions at Ridge and Hawes schools.

The Board will be asked to approve the school calendar for 2011-2012. I participated in the Calendar Committee – along with teachers, other staff, parents, students – and let me tell you, it is harder than one would think to come up with a calendar.

The Board will be asked to approve the disenrollment of a student found to be in violation of the District’s residency requirement.

Members of the BOE will discuss our response to the Planning Board’s invitation to a hearing regarding the lights at RHS Stadium and Stevens Fields. We will also discuss the list of RHS neighbor concerns and progress that’s been made to date.

Those are the highlights. You can see the entire agenda by clicking here.

Librarians to hold workshops on web resources for research/homework.

District elementary librarians are holding a workshop for parents to let them know about online resources for students' research and homework. "TO GOOGLE OR NOT TO GOOGLE?*" is being held on two nights -- Thursday, January 27 at Travell Library Media Center or Wednesday, February 9 at the Ridge Library Media Center. Librarians will show parents how to access and use multiple resources to help with homework and research. Both programs begin at 7:00 PM. These are parent information/workshop sessions on the resources available to our communities through our school libraries, which can be accessed from home.

*I don't think it should ever be a question of whether or not "to Google." The real thing we need to teach our children is how to evaluate and navigate information, no matter which search engine or web resource they use. This sounds like an informative evening, though, especially for parents who might not spend a lot of time online themselves.

Top 10 Events in Ridgewood Public Schools in 2010.

Since all the cool bloggers seemed to include Top 10 lists in their posts this past weekend, I thought I would do my version. This is a list of the 10 most important things that happened in the Ridgewood Public Schools in 2010. Obviously this is completely subjective and unscientific, and was only barely researched – it’s mostly off the top of my head, to be honest. If I’ve forgotten something that you feel belongs in the Top 10, let me know.

10. RHS Spirit Week. According to my son and daughter, in recent years, Ridgewood High School has not had much “school spirit.” In fact, I remember in 2006 when my daughter’s Class of 07 was thrilled when they successfully campaigned to hold a Homecoming Dance for the first time in years. This past October, however, Principal Jack Lorenz and his team of administrators focused on Spirit Week as a way to bring the campus together following several tragic events, including the deaths of two students and one former student in the space of a year. Spirit Week 2010 was a success, with unprecedented participation in various events, including a big pep rally before the first home football game and later huge dance on Halloween weekend. (Yes, there were some management issues with that dance and the unexpectedly large turnout, but the fact that so many kids wanted to be at the high school was a good thing.) Overall, the positive vibe of Spirit Week has continued throughout this school year and has brought a welcome sense of togetherness and sharing to a place that too often seems to focus solely on achievement.

9. Parent Involvement. Throughout the year, from Jamboree, Project Graduation and band and sports booster groups at the high school, to awesome parent-run Spirit Night at BF, to Somerville-Hawes Dad’s Night and continued growth of all the Home & School Associations, it’s amazing to see the level of parent involvement – and, of course, fundraising – that continues in Ridgewood. I don’t want to focus too much on fundraising, because I truly do think the parent involvement and volunteering alone is remarkable, but the fact is, in 2010 over $548,000 in funds or gifts-in-kind were donated to the RPS. Thank you for your generosity and commitment!

8. Ridgewood Dominates Bergen County Music Education. In early December, more than 350 students from around Bergen County auditioned and competed for 85 positions in the performing ensemble that recognizes Bergen’s best musicians. A total of 21 Ridgewood High School band members were selected to perform in the All-County Band, the most ever chosen from one school! (I’m told the previous record was held by…Ridgewood!). I’m so proud of our music students and our music faculty throughout the district.

7. RHS Girls’ Lacrosse State Champions! In June, Ridgewood High School’s girls’ lacrosse team won the school’s first-ever women’s state championship, defeating West Morris of Mendham 7-6. Abbey Van Horne summed up the team's feelings: "We knew this was going to be our year," said an ecstatic VanHorne. "We've had so much fun playing together that we almost felt like it was our fate to win. When we we're out there playing together and having fun we almost feel unstoppable. I couldn't ask for a better group of teammates and to accomplish this with them is absolutely amazing."

6. Skyward student information system. Over the summer, the District began implementing the Skyward student information system, a very sophisticated program to consolidate and manage all the information we hold about students – address and contact info, grades, discipline, etc. It was (is) a bumpy transition, but things are smoothing out and parents are starting to have access in new ways. For example, high school report cards and progress reports are completely online (no more racing home try to intercept the mail before Mom and Dad see the report card). This past semester, access was broadened to include a two-week window during which teachers’ entire grade books were accessible. Parents who wished to have more detailed information about their children’s academics were able to see assignment grades, homework, quiz and test scores, etc. Will this be helpful or create more stress?

5. Athletic field improvements & so-called “Lightgate.” The successful referendum in December 2009 meant long-overdue upgrades to the athletic fields at the RHS Stadium (who knew it was called that?), Stevens Field and BF. The artificial turf and drainage have resulted in a huge improvement to the Village’s field inventory, giving much more access to many more kids, instead of the fields sitting empty most of the time. Recent concerns of the neighbors regarding the lights and increased field usage are a bit of a speed bump – rumors and misinformation are an issue, once again – but we’ll work it out.

4. The long-awaited parent survey. In June, the District conducted a survey of all parents’ to find out what parents think about the schools their children attend. The results were reported in late December, and there will surely be additional discussion throughout this year. I’m hoping to make this an annual survey, so it will be most interesting to see how opinions change over time. Most surprising finding: several elementary school parents want more homework, more rigor and tougher academics as early as kindergarten. Hello? Race to Nowhere anyone?

3. Keeping score. In February, it was reported that Ridgewood’s SAT scores are number one in Bergen County, behind only Bergen Academies. NJASK scores for 2009-10 were recently reported, and while our elementary scores remain strong, our middle school scores show continued room for improvement, in comparison to other schools in our District Factor Group. Each principal (at every school, not just middle schools) is setting goals and creating action plans to achieve them. I’m perplexed by the middle school scores…it’s good to know that our students’ performance “catches up” in high school, but what is behind the middle school dip?

2. Referendum projects approved & on track. In December 2009 voters approved a $48 million referendum to upgrade and expand facilities. Throughout 2010, several roof repair and electrical projects were completed throughout the District, RHS saw massive repairs to sidewalks, stairs, doors, lighting, new lockers, etc. The Hawes School and Ridge School expansions are moving along. Bids will be received later this month for the expansions at GW Middle School and Willard School. Overall, Referendum 2009 represents the most facilities improvement in the District’s history, and will enable our schools to be used most efficiently to educate our entire student body.

1. Budget Cuts 2010. The most significant impact last year came from the $6 million in budget cuts we were required to make to keep the District budget within the state-mandated tax levy cap. The loss of our state aid, plus our failure to get concessions from our primary union, the Ridgewood Education Association, made a difficult situation even worse. Last March, prior to the budget vote, I wrote that the changes resulting from cuts would be affect our District for years to come. One early fallout: retirements of several veteran educators in June.

Fact-checking Waiting for Superman

Check out this well-researched blog by New York Public School Parents, which bills itself as the "independent voice of NYC public school parents." Just a little fact-checking on some of the statistics thrown about in the film, Waiting for Superman.

The Facts about chewing tobacco in Ridgewood

In the last few years, use of chewing tobacco has increased among students at Ridgewood High School. I have been surprised to hear from my son about kids using chewing tobacco at parties, after sport practice and even all day long at school. I can see the appeal for them -- it's so easy. And easy to conceal. Think about it: a kid can't walk around school smoking a cigarette, but he (and it's virtually 100% boys) can walk the halls with a chewing tobacco pouch in his mouth.

I understand that chewing tobacco (aka spit tobacco) use at RHS is cyclical. It goes in and out of popularity. Well, apparently, over the past year or so it's been on an upswing.

It's frustrating to see how manufacturers of smokeless tobacco products are marketing to kids, and some kids really think that chewing tobacco is a harmless alternative to smoking cigarettes. Yesterday's Bergen Record contained a story about tobacco companies encouraging smokers to use smokeless tobacco. Make no mistake: smokeless tobacco is not harmless and can be the cause of throat and mouth cancer. A very good friend of mine recently went through treatment for throat cancer, which he acquired after using chewing tobacco when he quit smoking. He is healthy, with one sad side effect: he lost his ability to taste anything sweet.

On January 18, 2011 at 7 PM in the Media Center at Ridgewood High School, Jamie England from the Center for Alcohol and Drug Resources will present to parents the Facts about Chewing Tobacco. Come and learn about smokeless tobacco and how to talk with your child about this dangerous and addictive product. Questions, call the Ridgewood Parks and Rec office at 201-670-5560. Funding for this program is made possible through GCADA, NJ Governor’s Council on Alcoholism and Drug Abuse, and the Ridgewood Municipal Alliance.